Listen to your heart
by whovalista
Summary: When Patrick Jane told Teresa Lisbon he loved her, he didn't quite get the reaction he was hoping for. Now 3 years later, he's back to try again. Only this time he is in for a surprise...
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hey guys! Welcome to a new Mentalist fanfiction. Woo. I don't know if this idea has ever been done before but here's a new one for you guys to read. And its my first multi-chapter. Sort of. Enjoy, leave a nice review that would be lovely. **_  
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**Disclaimer: I do not own The Mentalist or the characters used in this story.  
**

_I have only felt like this twice in my life. The first time being when I met Angela and the second being when Charlotte was born. The rush of love which hit me when I first stared into their eyes, the feeling of my heart pounding against my chest as I realised there was no turning back. This was literally the moment I had always dreamt of. Although my love for Angela was different to the love I felt for Charlotte, there was no denying how amazing it felt._

_But after what Red John did to them, I refused to ever let myself feel anything for anyone. I refused to hand my heart over as I knew it would result in me losing them again and again._  
_NEEAnd that's why when I met Teresa Lisbon; I made sure it was merely a work friendly relationship. Over the years, we bonded more and developed a deep friendship. And then it wasn't until a few days later I realised that I had fallen in love with my boss._

_Damn._

_But it was okay, I was great at acting. I could pretend like she meant nothing to me. Damn, I'd done it enough times to her._  
_But somewhere inside I wanted her to know. I wanted her to know how I felt, how I dreamt about running my fingers through her dark hair, how I wanted to caress her ivory skin with my hands and how I wanted to kiss her. I couldn't though. I couldn't put her in that risk. I'd already lost two people I love to my stupidity and I was not going to do it again._

_So why was I here?_

_I was in the quirky little bistro waiting for Lisbon... Teresa... to show up and so I could declare my undying love for her. I was nervous and this was unusual for Patrick Jane, I don't get nervous._  
_But she had that power over me. I considered getting up and leaving but that's when she chose to walk in. And I couldn't help but stare. She was wearing a low cut black dress, wow she had really taken my idea for her to dress up seriously, her hair pinned up with loose curls falling down her shoulders. I was breathless. This was it. My moment._

_She had a small smile as I reached for her hand and pressed my lips to it. We had a polite conservation about work, neither one being too interested. We had just finished our 2nd bottle of wine when I decided it was time. It was now or never. I made way for her hand again and that same small smile appeared._

_"Lisbon?" I coughed slightly, words catching in my throat. "How long have we known each other?" She looked away for a second trying to figure it out before a wide grin reappeared._  
_"8 years next week. Wow. I've managed to put up with you that long!" She giggled, taking another sip of wine. "Why do you ask?" I nervously smiled before looking into her eyes._

_"Well, you see recently I've been thinking, about everything really. How I always promised this would never happen. How I refused to let my past get in the way of what really mattered. And especially with what happened with Lorelei recently..." I break eye contact for a second, not wanting to see the heartbreak fill her eyes. "But you understand why I did that and that's why you mean so much to me. You get why I am chasing Red John and though you don't agree you let me get on with it. You trust me despite your better judgement and you have done so much for me these past few years. You have believed in me even when no one else has or would, you make me laugh, smile and I trust you more than anyone ever. And this is why I feel its right to tell you now..." I grin at her again and stroke her knuckles with my thumb. She looks curiously at me, confusion running across her face._

_"Teresa. I think I... no, I know. I am in love with you."_


	2. Chapter 2

It had been 3 years since Patrick Jane had left Sacramento. 3 years since he had upped and left the CBI. 3 years since he had seen Teresa Lisbon.

3 years.

3 long years.

He swore to put his previous crime fighting life behind him in order to make his own discoveries. His own revenge on Red John, without anyone stopping him. It had taken a while for him to re-settle in LA, distant memories of the past creeping their way back in. But eventually he had done it; he had found a new home, gotten a job with the local police force (okay, so maybe he wasn't ready to completely put his crime fighting duties away) and started a fresh.

So, why was he currently driving down Interstate 5 N toward Sacramento? One thing.

Teresa Lisbon.

Yes, he had left her without saying goodbye. Yes, he had left without any given warning but he could hardly stick around. He was tired of the waiting game and he was sick of her not noticing him. He sighed as the cool winds blew through his curls. 3 years. He had even forgotten why he had left in the first place.

_Because you told her you loved her._

Okay, so he hadn't forgotten. But he wasn't exactly thrilled about it either.

He remembered that day exactly and it had refused to leave his mind. He hated how he left her but for once things didn't go his way and he wasn't happy. But that didn't mean he had stopped. So when Cho had called him, requesting his help he immediately assumed she was in danger. He couldn't leave her to fend for herself. He was her protector, hadn't he said he would always save her?

He was edging closer and closer to Sacramento and he could feel questions burning into his mind. Would she forgive him? Was she mad? Why didn't she get in contact for these 3 years? Did she really hate him that much? He couldn't figure it out. He was convinced her life would of stopped without him, just like his had without her.

About 40 minutes later he pulled into the CBI, his little Citroen DS 21 protesting. This was not going to be easy, he could tell.

Immediately he noticed the changes, even from the outside. There was much more security since he'd left, the coffee cart had become closer and there was a lamppost filled with flowers. He wondered what had happened, again the worst images taking over his mind.

As he walked over towards the gate, he didn't even notice the suspicious fellow watching him with very serious eyes.

He was surprised to be let in so easily, he had always assumed that he would be re-greeted with angry stares or punched in the face. He was used to that. The entire ride in the elevator was filled with tension, nerves. Soon, he would be seeing Lisbon. And although, he could not wait to see her beautiful face, he knew he would have to own up to what he did. He wasn't looking forward to seeing how different she looked. Yes, she would still be beautiful in his eyes, but she would of lost weight, perhaps bags under her eyes, always tense. And it was his entire fault. He wasn't ready to see how broken she was, he wasn't ready to own up to what he did.

So, imagine how surprised he was when he saw how... fantastic she looked.

He stopped short of the bullpen, eyes wide watching her. She was just as beautiful as before, maybe even more. In fact, she looked happy. Happier than she ever had when they were together... as agent and consultant of course. It had never exceeded that.

He continued to watch her move elegantly around the room, giving orders out to the others. Cho. Rigsby. Grace. They all looked better than they had ever done. Maybe they had been better off without him. Perhaps he should have stayed away. It seemed his leaving had done them all the world of good. He wouldn't make this worse for her; he would just slip away before anyone noticed he'd even arrived.

"Jane?" He groaned as he heard Grace's voice call his name. Damn. Reluctantly he turned around, and met Grace's eyes. "Wow. It really is you. What are you doing here?" Her voice was filled with accusation, just like he knew it would be. He looked away from her and saw Rigsby. His face was filled with confusion, but acceptance. Cho was next and he was... well, it was hard to tell with Cho but he assumed he would be alright with him seeing as he was the one who called him. Last it was the face he couldn't wait to see but also didn't want to.

He glanced up.

Lisbon didn't exactly have a smile on her face, but she didn't look angry. She looked confused, hurt but relieved at the same time.

Perhaps she was happy to see him?

He took note of her features. Her green eyes were shining as brightly as emeralds, something they rarely did with him. Her brown hair cascaded down her back; good he loved her long hair. Everything else seemed the same; she was a little curvier than before which meant she was looking after her eating habits or someone else was. But none of that mattered, she was there before him and she wasn't mad.

Why wasn't she mad?

"Jane? What are you doing here?" Her voice finally appeared and he realised he was going to have to start explaining soon. But he didn't want that. He wanted to stay there, drinking her in. Just watching her, remembering what he gave up. He wasn't sure where to start so he was glad when Cho spoke up.

"I called him here. To help on the PJK Killer." Cho's deadpan voice rang around the bullpen. Lisbon looked from Cho to Jane and shrugged her shoulders.

"Okay. You may be of some help. Grace, get Jane up to date on the case so far. Rigsby and Cho you go by the Hart's house and ask them if Lisa had been speaking to anyone new. I want to know why she was targeted." She smiled and walked off, leaving Jane more confused than before.

He muttered apologies to Grace before hurrying off after Lisbon. He grabbed her left arm and slid his hand down to hers.

"What are you doing Jane?" She tried to tug her arm back from his but he wasn't letting go. She seemed to get very nervous as he held her hand.

"I. I wanted to know if you were ok. I mean, you seem fine that I'm back. You're not even mad, I'm a little surprised to be honest. I thought you would be biting my head off for leaving. I've been worried about it." He gave a little chuckle.

"What do you want me to say Jane? Yes, I was angry at first, distraught even but it's been 3 years. You can't expect me to stay mad." She looked at him and smiled slightly. "I'm bored of being sad and angry at you. It's time to move on from that. I'm even happy to see you." She pulled away from him and walked into her office.

He grinned to himself, wondering if this day could get any better. He was about to walk away when he felt something in his hands.

And that's when he noticed.

Why she wasn't angry at him, why she had been happy to see him, why she hadn't bothered to call him in 2 years. He charged into her office, and saw her standing by her desk. His eyes fell to her left hand and it all fell into place.

Teresa Lisbon was engaged.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Wow! I actually cannot believe the responses I've had to this story. You guys are all so fabulous! I shall respond to all the reviews soon I promise. Also, look at you lot getting two chapters in 2 days!**

**I was nervous about the previous chapter as I didn't think people would like it but you did. Ooh, yay. I'm also nervous about this one as well. As some of you may of guessed Jane's thoughts/memories are in Italics. I promise we will find out what happened with Jane and Lisbon at a later date, so I guess if you want to find out you'll have to keep reading! So reviews will be lovely. Thank you!  
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**Disclaimer: I do not own The Mentalist. That belongs to the wonderful Bruno Heller.  
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* * *

No. No. No, no, no, no, no.

There was no way Lisbon could be engaged.

No way. She was Lisbon. She wasn't the romantic sort; well she wasn't when they were friends.

No. No. He refused to believe it, she was Teresa Lisbon. Dedicated to her job, dedicated to helping people and dedicated to those who needed people.

Not the kind of woman who got engaged, who fell in love, who got married.

Then again, did he really know her at all? He had snippets of information but never really got close enough. He had refused to let her in and maybe she did the same. But still, he knew she would never get engaged.

But there she was, wearing a diamond ring on her left ring finger. And looking rather sheepish about it. He could not tear his gaze away from the ring.

"Your... your... engaged? Urm... I...urm... W...when?" He finally stuttered, eyes finally meeting hers.

She was watching him like a hawk, unaware of what to do. He started to laugh, but it wasn't a normal laugh. It was kind of hysterical, a manic laugh. He wasn't sure as to why he was laughing. It was his only way of coping with the idea of Lisbon, his Lisbon marrying another man.

"Alright, I knew it was a long shot but doesn't mean you need to laugh about it. I am capable of meeting a man you know. I am perfectly capable of being in love. I know it seems stupid to you but I do want those things." Lisbon retorted back, anger seeping through her words.

Jane instantly stopped laughing, realising he was hurting Lisbon.

Again.

But there was no way he could possibly understand. Why was she ready to love now and not then? Was it him? He knew he was broken and damaged but that shouldn't stop her from falling in love with him. He would make things better for her; he would do anything for her.

And now he couldn't. Because she belonged to someone else.

"Lisbon it's not that. I... I'm just surprised. I never imaged you being married that's all. It's just a bit of a shock." He smiled slightly, hoping to diffuse the tension. "It's just been a while as you know and well I didn't expect to come back to this news."

"That's not my fault Jane. I didn't run away. I didn't leave for 3 years without a single word." She pinched the bridge of her nose. "But I'm not discussing this now. Okay, I'm happy. Isn't that enough for you?" She looked at him once more, maintaining the glare she was holding. "Now, as Cho called you here to help on the case I think we should do that."

Before he could answer she glided past him, her scent of cinnamon wafting past him. He sighed, knowing this day was going to get worse.

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Jane took the time to notice that Lisbon acted as though he wasn't there. He supposed she had had the time to do this with such ease.

He still couldn't believe he hadn't been here for 3 years. Excluding Lisbon, nothing much had changed. They got a new boss, Heather Stroller.

Rigsby's little boy was now 4 and apparently so much like his father. Cho was currently dating Tasmin Wade, from the gangs department. Jane was pleased to hear this about this. He assumed something had changed in Grace's life but she refused to talk to him so there wasn't much he could find out.

He was pleased to see they had kept his leather couch. He liked to think it was Lisbon's idea to keep it, as maybe a reminder of him? As he took his seat, he watched Lisbon as he usually did. She moved with much more grace than before; seem to float around the room. It might sound cliché but she seemed to glow.

And it was all because of this new man.

Jane hadn't even met the guy but he knew he would hate him. How dare someone make Lisbon be happy and it wasn't him. God, he was bitter. Had he really become this awful in 3 years? Did he really hate himself that much that he hated anyone who even made their way into Lisbon's life?

He casually sifted through the case files, slowly getting to know the victim.

Lisa Hart. 19 years old. Recently graduated from Academy of Art University. No criminal record. No track record. There was no reason for her to be targeted, yet here they were trying to figure out her murder.

The PJK Killer was another matter. Jane personally felt the name was a little embarrassing, but that was because he was a man of complexity, a man of knowledge. Evidently this killer was not the same.

He was new on the scene, a rookie. The murders were not one of an intelligent man. They were sloppy, uncoordinated. Not one of a man who thought things through clearly. Jane was close to making a slight breakthrough when something caught his eye.

Or rather someone.

He watched as a new figure made their way into the bullpen. He was guessing the rest of the team were used to him as they didn't react the same way he was.

The man sauntered over to Lisbon, who had her back to everyone else. Jane felt the bile raise to his throat, as this man wrapped his arms around Lisbon's waist. He heard a small giggle and watched as Lisbon turned in this mans arms.

It was as if the world was playing in slow motion, as Lisbon and this man flirted in each others arms. They were smiling at each other, acting as though no one else was in the room.

He couldn't just stand there and watch Lisbon be in someone else's arm. He tried to slip away discreetly as possible. But of course, someone would pick that moment to notice him.

"Oh, who do we have here?" His voice called out from the bullpen. Jane stopped in his tracks and looked at the man now. His gaze turned to Lisbon, whose smile was slowly fading.

"Urm... this is... Patrick Jane." He watched as the new man's lips twitched at the sides. "Our ex-consultant."

The new guy reached for his hand to shake it. Jane reluctantly returned the shake, dreading what was coming next.

"Patrick Jane, this is Gary Davies, my..." she paused, a smile creeping across her lips.

_No. Please don't. Don't say the next words. Please. For the sake of my sanity, please don't say the next words. _

"My fiancée."


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hello, and welcome to another new chapter! I realise, I have been a little while and I apologise immensely. I don't really have a valid excuse; I guess I am just lazy. **

**Now, I realise I have a few reviews to reply to and I am just about to do that. I will apologise individually as well because I feel super bad. But their are a few people I can't personally review to so I shall do it here!**

**Guest: Thank you and I hope you have stuck with it!**

**Misfit 1-3: Ha-ha, I'm glad you feel sorry for Jane and I think you will feel even worse for him a little while on. Is there any particular reason you feel confused? If so, let me know in a review and I'll try and explain it. This story will make more sense as we go on. I hope anyway**

**Any who, apologies for the long Author's Note. Enjoy this chapter!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own The Mentalist. I do however own Gary Davies! (Ooh, that sounds strange)**

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It had been exactly 20 minutes since Patrick Jane had met Gary Davies and it wasn't going well for him. Gary was... disgustingly nice. He had shaken his hand, asked him about LA, gave him sympathy about his dead family and wished him luck on his quest with catching Red John.

In short, Jane hated his guts.

He must know that Jane was in love with Lisbon, that's why he was being so nice. He felt bad because Jane had lost and he had won. Well, two can play at that game. Jane would be disgustingly nice back to him.

He would ask him about his life, how he and Lisbon met, how he had proposed, about their wedding plans... Their wedding plans.

It was still something he couldn't quite believe. This man had managed to get Lisbon to agree to marry him. How had he managed? Jane told her he loved her and she went off the rails. Did he just have that affect on women?

God, he hoped not.

As he glanced over at Lisbon, who was barking orders at her team whilst Gary watched, he couldn't help but let his mind wonder to those few days where everything went wrong.

* * *

_It had been exactly a week since I told Lisbon... Teresa...that I was in love with her. I really should learn to start calling her that if we are to be together. _

_Although at this rate, it was never going to happen. _

_I knew she was avoiding me; I just wasn't sure as to why. I hadn't exactly done anything wrong. I'd only admitted my feelings. Was that a crime now? _

_I honestly thought it was obvious. I hadn't exactly been hiding them. Yes, I realised this put her at a great deal of danger with regards to Red John, but I was tired of hiding.  
I wanted the world to know how I felt about this wonderful woman and if it meant endangering her then so be it. _

_So, why was she acting as though I was invisible? _

_I had tried talking to her everyday this week, but every time I cornered her something came up. A case, Bertram wanting to suspend me, a coffee was needed, Rigsby was hungry. _

_I was glad I wasn't the only one who had noticed something was up. Cho had asked me a few times why Li... Teresa was ignoring me. Grace too questioned me. Rigsby hadn't said a word but I doubt he had noticed to be honest. Lisb... Teresa had been trying to act normal but she really is the worst actress I have ever seen. _

_I was debating whether to stay in my attic tonight or head to my motel, when Teresa walked into the bullpen. By the shock on her face when she glanced in my direction, I assumed she was expecting to see the rest of her team there. Well, she wasn't going to get away with it now. _

"_Teresa?" I said, as she turned to leave. I saw a slight shiver tremble her back and I was pleased to see I still sent her into that mode. "I think we need a chat." _

_With her back still turned towards me, she replied. "Actually Jane, I'm a little busy can it wait?" _

"_I've been waiting a week to talk to you." I was not going to give in, I needed to know what I had done and I needed to know now. I saw a shrug hit her shoulders and reluctantly, it seemed, she turned towards me. _

_She gave me a look and I realised I was the one to make the move. Okay, here it goes. To be honest Patrick, you had already done the worst part. A week ago. _

"_Why have you been ignoring me?" I asked softly. By the way her face flashed with a look of shock, I knew the jig was up. I took a step closer to her. "You see, my dear Teresa..."_

"_Don't call me that."_

"_You see my dear Lisbon; I know I piss you off a lot but when I do that you don't give me the silent treatment. No, you force yourself to talk to me as though this would be punishment. But this is different. You're ignoring me because you're afraid of something. Something I did. Was it because of what I said?" _

_She immediately turned away from me, her dark hair shielding her emerald eyes. I heard her sniff and felt my heart beat proudly. _

"_It's okay you know. I know it was a big step for us but its okay. I doubt you think it was unexpected and I realise it will be a difficult transition from being just friends to something more but we'll make it." _

_I hadn't noticed her glare until I'd finished speaking. Her eyes looked angry, confused and disgusted at the same time. _

"_Transition? Just friends? Something more?" She stared at me, as if I'd grown an extra head and told her I was secretly running for President. "How can you honestly think that?"_

_So this wasn't exactly how I imagined the conversation to run. To be honest, by this point I was expecting her legs to be wrapped round my waist, her soft lips touching mine, making our steady way to my couch... Stop it Patrick. _

"_Because I love you." _

"_So?"_

"_So... Why wouldn't it expand? I love you. You love me" _

_Her laugh had interrupted my train of speech and I was curious to see as to why. I had received many of Lisbon's dirty looks but this was by far the worst. _

"_You don't honestly believe I love you? Oh Jane, this is by far the funniest joke you've ever pulled." She looked straight into my eyes and I knew she wasn't hiding behind anyone or anything. _

"_I never have and never will love you Patrick Jane."_

* * *

Jane hadn't noticed the slight tears gathering in his eyes until he blinked and they all came tumbling down at once. He quickly wiped them away, hoping no one would notice. Not that they would anyway, Cho seemed to be the only one who had really acknowledged his existence since he returned.

He wondered why that was.

A slight squeal caught his attention and he was dragged back to the real world. Grace was hugging Lisbon with a great force and Gary was chuckling slightly. Rigsby had a grin on his face and Cho... well Cho looked normal but he could see a slight smile creeping at his lips.

He assumed that Lisbon had just asked Grace to be bridesmaid or Made of Honour or something ridiculous like that. Well at least someone was enjoying the idea of Lisbon getting married. He sure as hell knew he wasn't.

But he refused to give up.

He would find out why Teresa Lisbon didn't love him back.

Even if it drove him to the edge.

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A/N: So, I hope that chapter gave you a little more insight. Any questions feel free to PM me. Also, leave a little review! Thanks!


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Ohmygollygosh. I am really sorry for the long update. I haven't been feeling my best at the moment and although I had many ideas I couldn't write them down. So, I do apologise and I hope you have not given up on this story! I do have a few more ideas planned for another few stories but I shall devote my time to this whilst The Mentalist isn't currently on our screens): **

**I have a few reviews to reply to (apologies again for being so lazy to do this.) but there is someone I shall reply to here!**

**Idonthaveaname:** I know it sounds mean but I am glad your heart breaks for Jane! I'm glad I have managed to write that as I don't particularly think I would get that across! Well, here is the update and I'm so sorry for it. Ooh, you'll just have to wait and see.

**Disclaimer: So apparently Bruno Heller didn't sign The Mentalist over to me. **

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It was 4am when a knock at Jane's door distracted him from the documentary he was watching. At first he chose to ignore it, thinking it would just be a drunk falling over the place. However, another knock came followed by a small whisper. "Jane?"

He shot up, and scrambled to the door. "Lisbon?" He slowly unlatched the door and was stood to see the petite brunette standing there. "What are you doing here?"

She looked at him, tears glazing over her bright eyes. She blinked once and they all came tumbling down her face. It broke his heart to see her cry and he hoped he wasn't the reason for her tears.

"Oh Jane. I'm so sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. How could I ever do that to you? I hope you can forgive me." She tried to smile but it was hard as she was trying to hold the sobs.

"Teresa, sweetheart. What are you talking about?" Of course he knew what she was talking about but he needed her to confirm it.

"I'm talking about Gary! I'm talking about agreeing to marry him when I should be marrying you! I should be wearing your engagement ring on this finger not his. I should have never told you I didn't love you. That was a lie." She looked at him and gently removed her engagement ring. He gasped slightly but inside he was screaming.

"I have always loved you Lisbon, you know that. Why did you lie?" His breath had barely become a whisper as he watched Lisbon saunter over to him.

His breathing became laboured as Lisbon wrapped her arms around his neck. He shivered as her sweet breath tickled his ear. Subconsciously his arms engulfed her waist and he pulled her closer to him.

"I guess I liked the challenge." She replied. She leaned slightly back in his arms so he could see her properly. Tear stains ran over her cheeks but she was still beautiful.

Ever so slowly, their faces got closer and their lips slightly brushed each others. Jane was going to lean in to make the kiss deeper when Lisbon pulled back abruptly.

"Jane." She said but it wasn't her voice. It was far too deep to be Lisbon. It was a man.

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Jane woke up to the horrible realisation that it was just a dream. Lisbon hadn't come over at 4am and wanted to kiss him. His subconscious did. And the mans voice who 'Lisbon' was projecting was none other than Rigsby.

"Jane. It's time you got up. We have another victim." Rigsby was standing above him which meant he was on his couch. Had he slept here last night? He noticed the young agent was chomping down on what could only be described as a pastry mess.

"Fine. Where? I'll get changed and meet you there." He replied, closing his eyes once more. He could feel that Rigsby hadn't left and was curious as to why. Usually he would have spoken by now and left him to it but no. Today something was up.

"Can I help you Rigsby?"

"Urm... The Boss doesn't want you to be on your own. You have to stay with one of us. Sorry Jane." He mumbled quietly. Jane sighed once more and reluctantly got up off his couch. Sometimes he really did hate Lisbon.

_You could never hate her. _

Okay, so maybe that was a lie. Sometimes he hated the loyalty her team had to her.

"Why can't I go with Lisbon? That way you won't have to take the blame if I go wondering off." He smiled at Rigsby, hoping his tactic would work. But no avail, it would seem they had become immune to his 'powers' since he left.

"Sorry Jane. Lisbon's gone with Gary and Cho is with Van Pelt. You're stuck with me.'

Jane's face had fallen immediately when Gary's name had been used in the same sentence as Lisbon's. Although it had only been a dream, he had sincerely hoped that Lisbon had seen the error of her ways and called off the engagement. He nodded slightly and followed Rigsby out of the bullpen, knowing the day was going to get even worse.

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"Victims name is Sara Anderson. 16 years old. Been missing for 3 days now. Parents reported her missing on Monday night a day after she didn't come home.

"Kevin Tate over there, found her when walking his dog. Has a medium laceration in both wrists which suggest she was tied up. There is no blood around the scene which means she was murdered somewhere else. So far there is no evidence of sexual abuse or physical abuse except for a large bruise on her forearm and a deep 'P' cut into her chest."

Lisbon was updating her team, excluding Jane who was examining Sara. She was a few years younger than Charlotte would be, still so full of life. Taken cruelly away again.

"So, it's him again. The PJK killer?" Grace asked. Jane didn't need to turn around to know that she was frightened. Another serial killer on the loose. Not what they needed. He was still focusing on Sara; sure that something was different to the other bodies.

"Van Pelt, Rigsby. I want you to check the surrounding area. See if there are any security cameras or if anyone saw anything. Cho, you and Gary go and speak to the victim's family. See if Sara may have known her killer or if she had been acting differently." Lisbon released her team and Jane's heart stopped for a second.

He would be alone with her. Without her fiancée.

But that didn't mean that Gary wasn't going to be curious. Although they were stood at least a foot away but he could hear them clearly enough.

"Why are you staying with him? He's done nothing but cause you trouble for the majority of your life. I'm surprised you even want to be near him. Is he even aware of what he did to you?" Gary's voice rang with anger and surprisingly Jane found himself grinning.

So he annoyed Gary. Excellent.

"Look, what happened with me and him was 3 years ago. I just want him to feel settled on the case. Besides Jane and I used to be very close, I should try and re-heal that." Jane could hear the guilt laced in her speech and his face fell. So, she blamed herself? Interesting.

"Well, talk about the wedding. And if you don't tell him, then I will." Jane heard footsteps stomp away and soon enough he felt Lisbon's presence behind him.

There were a few moments of awkward silence as neither one knew what to say exactly. It had been at least a week since they'd spoken properly. Jane could never seem to get a word in edgeways when Gary was around.

"What do you think then?" Lisbon's voice said, finally breaking the silence. He smiled secretly; glad she had made the first move. That reminded him of his dream and he could feel a hot blush reach his cheeks.

"I think she was suffocated. There are no other indications to what she died of. She was recently dumped. She still had her boyfriends name written on her hand." He picked up the young girls hand and showed Lisbon. "It was her first boyfriend and I'm guessing the breakup was out of the blue. Perhaps she told him she loved him and he went off the rails...?"

He knew he was stepping into uncertain ground but he needed a reaction. And he sure got one.

Lisbon's face changed within seconds. First shock, then rage, then guilt, sadness and eventually she settled on anger. "Screw you Jane." She walked away from him, just like she had the last time he brought it up.

He sighed but also grinned at the same time. He had picked up that in those nanoseconds of Lisbon's face ranging from emotions she had fiddled with her engagement ring; which signified doubt.

Slowly he was worming his way into their relationship, one piece at a time.

* * *

It was 7pm and there had been no breaks in the case. Jane was correct about the boyfriend and they were conducting a search for him in the morning.

Cho, Rigsby and Van Pelt had all left hours ago but he remained. He was trying to work out why Lisbon had been messing around with her engagement ring. He was unaware of Gary standing in front of him until he saw his favourite teacup being set down besides his couch.

He watched as Gary sat down beside him and took a sip from his coffee. Jane was beginning to dislike Gary even more by the second.

First he steals the love of his life, then he worms his way into the team's good books and thirdly he was sitting on his couch.

"I know you dislike me, Mr Jane. I'm not a fool." Gary's voice broke the silence. Jane continued to look at his tea, which tasted delicious. Damn. "I understand why you do. After all I am engaged to the woman you love. Yes, I know you love her. As I previously mentioned I am not a fool.

"However Mr Jane, I am not giving her up. She is mine now and will be until the day she dies. You had your chance and you blew it. It's someone else's go now. And I'm the lucky fellow."

"What if she leaves you?"

Gary laughed, not a light-hearted laugh more a dark threatening laugh. Jane got the feeling that there was more to him than met the eye.

"She won't leave me Mr Jane. I've given her everything you never could. I was the one she turned to when she cried over you. I was there when she fell ill, when she happy, when she was sad, when she was stressed. I was everything to her and you were and are not. So, that is why she will not leave me. She has come to rely on me far too much.

"Another reason Mr Jane is because if she does I can have her fired within seconds. I'm a very powerful fellow in my line of work and I have the power to be rid of Teresa Lisbon. So if you mess this up for me, which I'm sure you're going to attempt, then consider this: Teresa Lisbon will lose her job. Because of you. And that'll make her hate you even more than she already does."

Gary stood, leaving Jane feeling deflated. He looked up and was met with the sly smirk of Gary Davies.

"I am aware Mr Jane, that I have revealed myself to you quite early on. Most villains would wait till later on to reveal the full extent of their plan to their opposition. I, however, am incredibly smart and thought it would be fair to give you the heads up before you tried anything stupid."

He made his way over to the exit of the bullpen before turning round one last time.

"Good Luck with your quest for the heart of Teresa Lisbon. But remember, I already have a head start. She trusts me more than she could ever trust you, Patrick."

* * *

A/N: so, what did you think? Leave a little review and I'll update much quicker next time!


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hi... I'm a little ashamed of myself to be honest. It's been over 2 weeks. I'm so sorry. I know 2 weeks seems like forever. I just hope you haven't given up on me.  
I'm writing an extra long chapter because I'm afraid to say this is going to be the last update for a little while. If you read my recent fanfic, **_**Cardinal Tears **_**then you'll know I've recently had a tragedy at home and it's affected me deeply. I promise though I will get this updated quicker after this. Promise.  
Guest: **you don't know how sad your review made me. I'm sorry if it seemed the easy way out, but I do have a twist up my sleeve, so if you're still there I hope you decide to stick it out!  
**Anyway. Onwards as they say.**

**Disclaimer: Oh you thought I owned The Mentalist? Well, mine and Bruno's names are similar. (That IS a joke, I'm called Lauren, not Bruno.)**

* * *

_It was 5am and I was sat on my couch, drinking now cold tea and gazing over at Lisbon's office every 5 seconds. _

_It had been 5 weeks since I told Teresa I loved her and 4 weeks since she told me she would never feel the same way. And at first, I was heartbroken. _

_Yes, I'll admit I didn't want to get out of bed the first few days. I skipped work and stayed at my motel, questions continuously burning through my mind. Why didn't she love me? What had I done? What was wrong with me? _

_I had always been sure she felt something back. I know I seem vain but the way she acted around me, I always assumed that she cared about me more than just a friend. I suppose my mentalist skills weren't as great as they once were. _

_After staying indoors for 3 days I decided I needed to face the real world. Really that meant facing Teresa. I was nervous, I thought she may have yelled and told me to leave her alone. But what she did was worse. _

_She acted as though I was invisible. _

_And it's been like that for the past 4 weeks; which is why I'm sat on my couch, deliberating what to do. I could stay and live my life out like a pathetic loser, wasting my days staring at Teresa Lisbon, watching her move on without me. Or... No, I couldn't. Could I? _

_It would kill her... Then again, she's basically killed you. Hmm... I couldn't leave her. No. I wouldn't. I would spend the rest of my life dedicated to this woman, that's what I should do. _

_But although I don't deserve happiness, I surely don't deserve to ache after a woman who would never return anything back. I wasn't going to waste my days. _

_Screw it. _

_I quickly dashed upstairs and packed my few items up into a suitcase. I called the motel and told them to give up my room. I would be by later to pay them. _

_I came back down and made my way over to her office. I was the only one here and knew she wouldn't mind. She probably wouldn't notice. I opened the door and looked inside, storing her office into my memory palace. It held many memories; me tap dancing, her threatening me, me telling her I loved her then denying it... _

_I sighed and left, tears already forming my eyes. I didn't want to go but what was the point in staying? The woman I loved didn't love me back and I wasn't going to let her see it affected me. _

_I walked over to the bullpen, gazing fondly at the teams desks. I stroked my couch goodbye and was heading out when I heard a small voice. _

"_Jane?" I turned and was surprised to see Grace standing there. I checked my watch and was surprised to see it said 6am. Had I seriously spent an hour musing? _

"_Are you okay? You look lost." Grace smiled as she walked over. I stared at her until I saw her eyes drop to my suitcase. She looked back up at me and back down to my suitcase. _

"_A...are you going somewhere?" She asked looking at me once more. I looked away not wanting to meet her gaze. I heard her gasp as the realisation sunk him. "Jane! You can't go! We haven't caught Red John yet! You and Lisbon haven't..." She stopped short, and out of the corner of my eye I could see her raise a hand to her mouth. _

"_This is because of her isn't it? Because she won't admit she loves you. Isn't it?" _

"_That's the point Grace! She doesn't love me! She's already told me she will never love me, so what is the point in staying?! I can't stay round here watching her fall in love with someone else, I can't, and I won't. I'm not staying for my revenge on Red John; she'll be safer if I'm not here. I'm sorry but there is no purpose in me staying!" I felt bad for yelling but it was the truth. _

_Before she could say anything else, I walked over and hugged her. _

"_Promise me you will look after her." I murmured. I felt her nod and that was my signal. I released my hold on her and walked away. _

_For good. _

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It occurred to Jane to get back in the good books of the team, he would need to apologise to Grace.

Although Cho was fine with him, Rigsby wasn't. But if Grace was okay with him, then so would Rigsby. He sat on his couch and watched the team continue with their current case. He assumed that Lisbon and... Gary was in her office.

He wasn't sure what to make of the situation with Gary. He couldn't believe that a man would be so inconsiderate to threaten his fiancée's job or to take him up on a challenge.

The man was evidently stupid.

It got to 12 before Grace made a move from her desk. He watched as she stood and made her way over to the break room. Jane waited 10 seconds and followed her, teacup in hand. He could sense that Grace was unhappy with his presence but he didn't care.

"Grace?"

He saw her back stiffen and she chose to ignore him. He decided he would just talk to her and force her to listen.

"Look, I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I understand you must hate me for leaving you guys like that but I had to. I couldn't just stick around like a lost puppy. It wouldn't be fair on me. And I know, it wasn't fair to leave Lisbon I get that. I'm going to make it better I promise. I just need to know that we are okay. I have missed you guys, you know that? I honestly do get why you're mad at me for leaving Lisbon but you see..."

"You think I'm mad for you leaving Lisbon?" She interrupted and turned to look at him.

Jane could feel confusion filling his face, so he nodded. "Of course, why else would you be mad at me?"

Grace sighed and picked up her coffee mug, which was now full. She turned around fully, and stared at him.

"I'm not mad because you left. I'm mad because you gave up."

* * *

Jane deliberated his situations.

He had the obvious situation with Lisbon, the situation with Gary and now the situation with Grace. The one with Lisbon was easy, he just needed to make her realise that Gary was wrong and he was right. He could always make Gary disappear...

No, he would not go down that road.

The one with Gary was a bit more difficult. He wasn't sure how to handle that one. He was still confused as to how Gary was an evil genius.

The one with Grace may take some time, he noticed. It was going to be difficult to make her see that his reasons for leaving were perfectly understandable. But, if he could make Grace see it then he could make Lisbon see it.

This reminded him...Lisbon had been deeply affected by his leaving.

Why would she be so upset if she didn't care about him? He smiled at his musings only to be disturbed by the woman herself. Ah, how breathtaking she was. She marched into the bullpen, demanding information on Sara Anderson's case. They had had no luck with the boyfriend, rock solid alibi apparently, but Jane's instincts told him otherwise.

But he wasn't here for the case. He was here for Teresa.

He glanced over at her as she listened to Rigsby, and took in her features. She was simply beautiful and he couldn't believe he had given up so easily.

Grace was right. He was a fool for leaving. How could he of ever left such a beautiful woman like Teresa Lisbon go? And now he was too late.

Gary bloody Davies had gotten in there. He was right. Lisbon would never leave him.

Speaking of him, he had just entered the bullpen. He saw Jane sat there and winked. He walked over to Lisbon... his Lisbon... and kissed her full on the mouth. Jane glared as Lisbon responded gratefully and took him into her arms.

Jane sighed once more and got up from his couch. He didn't want to see Lisbon get it on with her fiancée. As he walked out of the bullpen, he missed Teresa Lisbon watching him go with a sad look in her eye.

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It dawned on Jane that he could have just left and gone back to LA.

But his instincts told him to stay, that there was something worth staying for. Sure, Lisbon was engaged but there had to be something he was missing.

He couldn't get over the fact that Lisbon felt guilty for his leaving and that she was upset. He knew she had been upset when he'd gone to Vegas for 6 months, but he sensed this time it was different. He must have done something for Lisbon to react the way she did but he couldn't figure out what.

He knew it would hit him eventually, it always did.

He just wasn't sure when.

It took him a while to realise that Grace and Rigsby was stood in the doorway of his attic.

"Jane."

Jane sat up immediately and noticed the ex-lovers. He smiled weakly and invited them in. Rigsby walked straight in, Grace hesitating by the door.

"How can I help you two today? If you've come to yell at me about anything, please hurry up. I'm in a loathing mood so this will be welcomed." He smirked slightly to himself, but noticed his companions weren't laughing.

They looked awkwardly between themselves before Grace spoke up. She sat down on his makeshift bed and looked Jane directly in the eye.

"Are you really going to give up?"

Jane sighed silently and glanced between the two. Not knowing what to say, he nodded meekly.

"Because, the thing is" Rigsby started whilst Grace watched him. "Although we like Gary, and he is great for the boss. I mean, he's awesome. He bought me and Cho tickets for this game last month and it was off the hook. He also..."

"Wayne!" Grace interrupted, shaking her head. She turned back to Jane. "What he meant to say was, although we like Gary and he is good for Lisbon... He isn't you. You are what will make her happy and although she pushed you away, she must have had her reasons."

Grace stood once more and Rigsby joined her. Grace gave him one last look before finishing.

"All we're saying is, don't do what you did 3 years ago. Fight for her. Because in 2 months you are going to lose her for good."

Jane sat on his bed, considering what his friends had said.

He wasn't the only one who wanted him and Lisbon together.

Everyone did.

* * *

**A/N: hope you like this chapter. I know it may seem a bit pointless but hey ho, next chapter will contain some Jisbon moments! Tee hee. Until the next time, please leave me a little review so I can have a smile on my face. **


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Hey, I'm back again. Woo. So, I'm updating quicker than I thought, my little brain conjured up a chapter and I needed to share. How exciting for you all. **

**So this chapter contains major Jisbon (BEST NEWS RIGHT) whether it will give you any answers or not I don't know, but I really wanted to write some Jisbon because everyone loves them. And it has quite a big cliff-hanger at the end (well I thought so.)**

**Guest: **I'm pleased you find it intriguing, I wasn't sure it people would be interested but they are so I'm happy. Here's the update!

**Disclaimer: Still don't own The Mentalist. But Gary is my creation. Mwahaha.**

**Now, I want to take a moment to say thank you to everyone who has reviewed my story, favourite it and followed and you all can have big hugs from me. But there is one person who always writes me the longest reviews and points out so many things which I kind of missed.**

**So JaneDoe1, I'm dedicating this chapter to you. Enjoy.**

**Ps: I've changed my pen name cos I hate my last name. So I'm still here (:**

* * *

It wasn't easy for him, seeing her so happy. Of course she deserved happiness, god she deserved it more than she knew. She was the most selfless person ever and it was only time she found someone. But he had always hoped she would find happiness with him.

Jane looked over from his couch and watched her. It was his favourite pastime. Lisbon was stood with Gary, smiling as he played with her hair. Jane smiled sadly as Lisbon pulled Gary in for a kiss, her soft lips lingering on his. Gary pulled back, grinning.  
Of course, since Gary magically was assisting on this case they could be loved up as they wanted. Jane pondered, wondering why he didn't know what Gary did yet. Why hadn't it clicked into place for him?

He really needed to get back into gear.

He looked away as Lisbon kissed Gary again, and he muttered again.

"Right guys, SACPD want to clean the crime scene as the Johnson's want to go home. Seems suspicious but whatever."

They had had a new case in, another victim of this supposed serial killer. Jane was beginning to suspect that Gary had something to do with it, that he was the killer. He chuckled to himself. Ha, imagine that Lisbon falling for a murderer. That would teach her.

"Something funny Jane? Something you'd like to share?" Lisbon's stern voice brought him back to reality and he felt his grin fall off of his face.

"No boss. Just got an idea as to who the murderer could be."

Lisbon glared at him a while longer, before walking off muttering something to Cho. Almost immediately the team got back to work, apart from Jane and Gary. Jane noticed they were the only two not doing something so he decided to grab some tea.

"Jane?" Gary's voice rang out from the bullpen. Jane stopped in his tracks not ready for another lecture from Gary. Why didn't this man understand that he did not like him?

"I just wanted to ask you something. About the wedding?"

"Yes?"

Gary smiled to himself and took a step closer to Jane. "I know you and I have had our differences, with us both being in love with Teresa and me actually succeeding in courting her. But she does still care about you, you know? And well the other day she suggested an idea to me, but she feels embarrassed to ask you. So I thought I would take the liberty."

He took a breath in and smiled at Jane.

"Teresa and I, well mainly Teresa, would love to invite you to our wedding."

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"I suppose you think its funny don't you?!" He asked, as he stormed into Lisbon's office. This was going to be the first proper time they had spoken to each other without anyone else around.

"I'm sorry?" She asked, genuinely curious.

"Don't act dumb Lisbon, it doesn't suit you." He stopped pacing and glared at her. "Inviting me to your wedding, is that how you get your kicks?!"

He was on a rage, taking no survivors. He didn't care if he hurt Lisbon. She had hurt him enough.

"I haven't invited you to my wedding. I don't want you there."

"Oh ha ha. Gary just told me you want me at your wedding. Is it so you can get a good laugh? 'Oh look at Jane, all depressed and upset because his precious Lisbon is marrying another man'. Well guess what? I couldn't care less. I don't even love you anymore!"

To say Lisbon was annoyed was an understatement. Her face filled with an unknowing rage and she stood from behind her desk and walked over to him.  
"How dare you! How dare you! You have been missing from my life for 3 years. 3 years Jane! Do you have any idea what that did to me? No, you wouldn't because you weren't here!" Her eyes started to brim with tears, and Jane automatically began to feel guilty.

"Lisbon, I..."

"No. It's my turn to talk now. So sit down and listen for once in your life!"  
Jane reluctantly sat down and waited. Lisbon pinched the bridge of her nose and stood in front of him.

"Jane, when you left I was angry. I first thought you left for yet another Red John scheme and again hadn't bothered to tell me. But when it got to 6 months and you still hadn't come back I just assumed it was going to be longer this time round.  
"That's when I tried to call you. But you'd switched numbers, switched everything. I had no way to contact you. And that is when I realised, I had lost you forever." She quickly wiped the tears away from her eyes.

"3 years Jane. 3 years you have been gone and you can't even give me any answers as to why. And then you come in here and yell at me because I could possibly want my best friend to be at my wedding. Gary thought I was mad, wanting to invite you after what you did..."

"Excuse me? What I did? What about what you did?" Jane stood up and they were stood face to face, inches away from each other. "Lisbon, you broke my heart. And you had no reason to. Of course I'm going to be mad. You're marrying a man who you barely know when you've known me the longest but you wouldn't even give me the time of day!"

Lisbon gaped at him, opening and closing her mouth a few times before considering what to say. She took a step back from, uncomfortable with their closeness.

"I do know Gary; I've known him for 2 years Jane. When you weren't here. He was there for me when you left without any warning!" Her voice was rising once more and Jane could see her cheeks reddening.

"Well I wasn't about to stay around here when the woman I love didn't love me back!"

"Of course I love you, you idiot!" Lisbon gasped and threw her hand to her mouth, eyes widening at the revelation she had just spilled. Jane was staring at her, but he could feel the tug of a smile hinting at his lips.

He barely noticed Lisbon run out of her office. Lisbon loved him. Lisbon loved him.

So why did she deny it 3 years ago?

* * *

Jane was still recovering from the shock of Lisbon being in love with him when she called him into her office.

It had been a day since she had accidently revealed herself and he couldn't wipe the stupid grin off of his face.

However, it would seem Lisbon wasn't as impressed.

She had been angry with everyone today, snapping at officers, victim's families, even her Gary. That had made Jane chuckle. Gary had tried to calm her down; tame would be a better word to use. Lisbon had fought against his arms and almost screamed his head off.

So today probably wasn't the best day for Jane to try his plan at catching out their killer. Jane in the end was right, much to Lisbon's chagrin.

The 'PJK Killer' turned out to be a middle aged couple, who were mourning the loss of their teenage daughter. They felt she died unjustly and were taking their anger on young girls who looked very similar. Jane understood their pain, wanting to take your anger out on anyone who is nearby but unlike them, he knew when to stop.

Jane had tried to hypnotise the woman into revealing herself, yet her husband had come home early. He found his wife and Jane and immediately assumed the worst. He chained them both up and was on the verge of killing them, when Lisbon and the team had turned up.

Lisbon hadn't wanted to deal with Jane at the scene and he knew his punishment was coming fast.

Jane was sat in her office and he was aware that Lisbon was glaring and yelling at him but he didn't pay attention to her words.

He was watching her and taking in her beauty. He noted how her hair was falling around her face, strands flowing in front of her eyes. Her eyes were a darker shade of emerald, probably of her being angry at him.  
Her ivory skin was a little red, her cheeks full of that gorgeous blush he adored so much. Her small frame was shaking with rage, and despite her being tiny she still held all the power.

But his favourite part of Lisbon was her lips.

They were a deep shade of red today, fuller than normal. He noticed she bit her lip when she was considering what to say, licked them when she took a breath and touched them when she stopped talking.

He honestly wondered how he had gone this long without ever touching them with his own lips.

"Jane, you could have ruined the entire investigation! You put everyone's lives in danger! Do you realise this? Jane? Jane?!"

"Sorry what?"

"Oh for goodness sake Jane. This is what I'm talking about. You never listen. You al..." Lisbon continued to rant whilst Jane zoned out once more. He couldn't help but watch her again, she truly was breathtaking. He wished he had stuck around, made her realise how great they would be together but she was someone else's now.

Yet when she bit her lip again, Jane couldn't take it anymore. It was now or never. He got up from her couch and took the few steps to where she was standing.  
He moved a strand of hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear. She shivered at the slight touch and he smiled warmly at her.

Then he broke the friendship line as he finally took her lips as his own.

He kissed her softly at first, getting accustomed to her taste. He wouldn't go any further until Lisbon accepted him. It took a few moments but he knew he had succeeded when he heard a slight moan escape her lips.

He grinned and pushed his tongue into her mouth. She happily accepted and he felt her arms curl around his neck and her fingers crawl into his hair. The kiss became much more passionate, Jane keen to learn Lisbon all over again. She tasted sweet, and he was happy to enjoy her over and over.

He broke it quickly so he could pick her up and place her on her desk. Almost immediately she grasped his lapels and pulled him back to her. The kiss was hot, intense, 13 years of longing pulled into one moment.

But as soon as it started, it ended.

Lisbon pulled away first and gasped. She placed her hand to her mouth, just as she had done the day before. She squeaked and got down from the desk, pushing Jane away as she did so. She ran to the door and yanked it open.

"Y...y...ou...sh...Should...G. ."

"Lisbon, please."

"I really need you to go. Please." She refused to meet his gaze, a common occurrence he had picked up on since he had been back. Jane sighed and walked on over. He placed his hand under her chin and lifted her face to him.

"You shouldn't feel guilty Lisbon. It's obvious what your heart wants. Why not listen to it for a change?" He whispered, letting his sweet breath run over her face. She trembled slightly before composing herself.

"Get. Out. Now."

Jane nodded and let her face go, leaving her office and sulking past the bullpen. This was not his day.

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He smirked to himself, watching the scene unfold.

He had just watched Patrick Jane kiss his fiancée Teresa Lisbon and she had kissed him back.

He walked away from her office and smiled to himself.

His plan was slowly coming together.

They just didn't know it yet.

* * *

A/n: ooh. How did you find that chapter? Like the kiss? Like the sort of cliff-hanger? Leave me a review and thoughts and I'll probably update at the weekend. (:


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: oh. So it would seem it's almost been a month since an update. Whoops. In my defence I have exams coming up and everyone's been on my back because I'm not doing well enough. Urgh. But you didn't come here to hear about my personal life, you came here to read another chapter of this. Yay. **

**In all honesty, I don't know where this chapter came from. I needed to get an update but it will fit in. Promise. I think there may be 2 more chapters after this, depending on where this one goes. **

**I also remembered I need to thank people for their reviews; I'll get there eventually but for now: **

**THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO HAS REVIEWED. IT MAKES ME HAPPY. **

**Means a lot you are all continuing to read this and haven't given up on me or got bored. **

**Disclaimer: nah, I'm too stupid to come up with the idea of The Mentalist. **

* * *

It was awkward.

No doubt about it. It was awkward.

Jane hadn't had the chance to talk to Lisbon since the kiss, which was now 3 days ago, but you could cut the tension in the room with a knife.

Jane thought, seeing as the case had been closed that Gary could just bugger off and leave them all alone but no avail. He seemed to be there more often, like he knew what he and Lisbon had done.

_Don't be stupid Jane, he has no clue. No one does. He is not as intelligent as you. _

That thought made him smile.

He needed to talk to Lisbon for many reasons. One to ask what she meant when she told him she loved him. Two; why did she deny it 3 years ago? Three; why was she engaged to some dude who magically appeared? And 4; why did she kiss him back?

As Jane was thinking all these wonderful yet confusing things he had failed to notice that Gary had left Lisbon's office. He also failed to notice that he was coming into the bullpen with a massive smile on his face, and Lisbon trailing behind him. Yet she wasn't smiling.

It wasn't until Gary coughed extra loudly that he noticed them.

"Excuse me everyone, Teresa and I have an announcement." Gary stood at the entrance to the bullpen, just in front of the break room.

Jane was listening with a heavy heart. He tried to make eye contact with Lisbon but she refused to look at him. What was Gary about to announce that had Lisbon all worried.

Oh no. Oh God no.

Not that.

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_It's been 3 weeks since I left the CBI and in total I have received 78 text messages, 20 voice mails and God knows how many missed calls. _

_And they are all from Teresa. _

_Urgh, I'm such an idiot. I really shouldn't have left without saying goodbye. That was stupid of me. Why did I leave without saying goodbye? _

_Because you thought you were doing what was best for her. _

_Damn. I should call her. No, I shouldn't. Yes, no, yes, no. _

_No. _

_I'm not going to call her because she hurt you remember, she told you she would never love you and well, why should she deserve a phone call. _

_I suppose I could let her know I'm alive. _

_No. I can't have anything to do with her. Not anymore. _

_Its better this way Patrick, you know that. Right? _

Jane stood staring at Lisbon and Gary for what seemed a lifetime.

They had brought the wedding forward.

To next week.

Next week.

How was he supposed to win over Lisbon if they were getting married next week?!

He saw everyone's reactions: Grace squealing with excitement, Rigsby dropping his sandwich surprise, Cho... well Cho didn't have much of a reaction.

But he could tell his was the worst.

And by the look on Lisbon's face, it looked like she could agree.

"N...next we...ek?" Jane's voice came out as a tremble. "W...hat made you decide on th...that?"

Gary wrapped an arm around Lisbon's shoulder and pulled her tighter to him. "Well I'm going away on business soon and I'll be gone for at least 6 months. And well I didn't want to not marry Teresa before I left so we're doing it next week. And besides this way I can ensure no one steals her away from me." Gary glared at Jane.

Did he know?

"Well, um, congratulations. That's fantastic news. Best get my suit ready then. Ha ha ha." Jane laughed nervously as Gary watched him. He didn't dare look at Teresa, afraid of the hurt being shown in his eyes.

Jane fell against his couch as they walked away.

"Jane?"

He looked up as Grace's soft voice came from her desk. He stared at her until she continued.

"I meant what we said. You need to hurry up. You only have 7 days. And I suggest you do it before her actual wedding. Otherwise she's going to start questioning why you are still here."

He nodded silently, letting her words sink in.

He had a week.

How do you convince a woman to leave their fiancé in a week?

He had managed to get rid of Gary for a few hours.

He'd convinced Cho and Rigsby to take him out for suit shopping as apparently he hadn't sorted it yet.

Grace was easy to get rid of, he just told her his plan and she'd listened and asked for an early lunch.

This left him and Lisbon all alone.

He planned to do it discreetly, ask her why she was getting married so early on. Why she had brought it forward. Why she hadn't left him yet. Only it didn't go the way he had planned.

"What are you doing Lisbon? I mean seriously. You are engaged to another man, then tell me you love me, then kiss me, then bring your wedding forward. It's very confusing for everyone involved!"

Lisbon looked up from her computer, with a smirk on her face.

"You do realise you sound like a teenage girl?"

He started laughing then. In his haste to get his words out they had come out in a sort of high pitched squeal. "Sorry. But Lisbon, help me understand."

She sighed then and broke eye contact. "You heard Gary, Jane. The exact reasons he said. He's going away for God knows how long and well I wanted to be Teresa Davies before he left. Hence the bringing forward of the wedding."

"But we kissed Lisbon. No, it was more than a kiss. It was an 'I-must-have-you-know-kiss-otherwise-I-might-explo de.'"

"I'm sorry Jane. I love Gary and I am going to marry him next week. I hope you can understand that."

He shook his head and walked over to her. He turned her chair around and bent down so he was eye level.

"I can't Teresa. I can't and won't accept it. I lost you once; I'm not going to do it again."

She placed a hand on his cheek and brushed away the tears that had fallen.

"Then why have you?"

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

It was like déjà vu.

Here he was, packing up his car, after Teresa Lisbon had, yet again, broken his heart.

He didn't have much to pack away, he'd barely brought anything.

He sighed and glanced the CBI building once more. What was it about this building that made his heart ache?

He supposed it was the memories. They all included Lisbon. Well, he'd be surprised if they didn't, that's where they had met.

He would never take back that day. Not for one second.

But for now, he was going. Going back to California, back to his crappy apartment and his crappy job.

Away from Teresa Lisbon and her beautiful face, away from Grace, Rigsby and Cho.

Away from Gary 'ooh-look-at-me-being-engaged-to-Teresa-whilst-I-b reak-Patrick's-heart' Davies.

Away from...

Wait.

He couldn't let Teresa marry a man who was so willing to threaten him. Who was willing to threaten Teresa's job because of him. No, he couldn't and wouldn't.

He still had 3 days to go until the wedding.

And what did Grace say?

_I suggest you do it before the wedding. Otherwise she's going to start questioning why you are here. _

Well, 3 days was enough to find out who Gary Davies was and why he had chosen Teresa. 3 days was enough to call off a wedding.

3 days.

* * *

A/N: dun dun duunnnn. Well, well, well. What did we think? Leave me a review, I'm excited! Patrick is finally getting his arse into gear and doing something about it. Next Chapter: we find out who Gary Davies really is and why Lisbon denied Jane all those years ago. Go on REVIEW. :D


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Hey, hey! It's not been that long has it? Yay. I think that is a bit of an achievement; round of applause for me. Anyway, so here is Chapter 9. And I'm afraid it's the last chapter! ): So I'm going to make it a little longer. However, I do think you'll be very impressed (well I hope) as it does some explaining and reveals all. Happy times. So, I am gutted that this is the last chapter, I have had so much fun writing it and I hope you have had fun reading it! I will get round to thanking you all, life has been pretty hectic recently and so I haven't had the chance. Oh and I'm sorry if the characters may seem a little OOC, it's your decision though!**

**But my faithful readers if you miss this story or you miss me, and then I have good news! I already have a new story planned and I think its going to be pretty intense. However, I may take a while to write it because my exams are in 3 weeks. Scary!  
Anyway, I shall shut up now because you wanna read this! **

**Disclaimer: I still don't own The Mentalist. And I am certainly not ready for the finale!**

* * *

The smartest thing Jane should have done was to plan his actions carefully. He should have thought what he was going to say how he should say it and not lose his temper with Lisbon's fiancée.

Of course, that's completely the opposite of what he did.

Everyone knew that Jane was a man of irrational decisions and Gary Davies should have known that too. But of course he wasn't expecting Patrick Jane to come knocking on his door at 8pm.

"Ah Patrick, to what do I owe the great pleasure?"

Jane stormed past Gary and into his house. He took a few breathes before turning around and glaring at his new worst enemy.

"I don't understand you Gary Davies! You come into our lives and you steal Teresa away from me and you get engaged to her, you threaten her job and me and then you go and bring the wedding forward! What is your intention?! You already have her, isn't that enough?"

"Patrick, please take a seat." Gary said calmly, gesturing to a sofa nearby. "I think some explaining is in order." Gary took a seat and waited for Jane to do the same.

Jane collected his thoughts and slowly lowered himself onto the sofa, keeping an eye on Gary.

"Patrick, do you love Teresa?" Gary asked, looking at Jane directly in the eye.

Jane laughed and stood up once more. "What kind of question is that?! She's your fiancée not mine. So... I..."

"Patrick." Gary interrupted. "I know you are in love with her. I saw you and her in her office a few weeks ago. I'm not stupid."

Jane's knees went weak and he fell against the sofa, where his breathing slowed down. So many things were rushing through his mind: why wasn't Gary mad? Why wasn't Gary letting him speak? Why did Gary know and not say anything?

"It was obvious you were in love with her, why else would you leave? You caused her so much pain, anguish, she cried for months. Couldn't understand why you would leave after a confession like that. But I suppose" he chuckled "no man fancies sticking around someone who doesn't love you back, am I correct?" He looked over at Jane, awaiting his reaction but none came.

"But that's just the thing, she does love you Patrick. And I tried to kid myself otherwise, tell myself that she didn't love you, that she only loved me but..."

Gary looked way and sniffed. He sighed deeply before turning his gaze back to Jane.

"A year and a half it took me to convince her to marry me. I reckon if you had stuck around she would have never wanted to marry me. I don't think she does. I do believe she did at one point, just not now. Not since you returned. Since you came back, you're all she's talked about.

"Jane this, Jane that. Jane could make the suspect do this and that. On and on and on. Do you know what that's like? Having your fiancée speak of another man all the time? It's annoying." Gary continued, whilst laughing slightly. Jane chuckled quietly to himself; unsure of what was happening.

"Why did you bring the wedding forward then, if you thought she had doubts?" Jane whispered his voice hoarse.

"I was hoping it may have made her realise that you were what she wanted. She did seem phased by that kiss but she didn't do much else. Just pretended you didn't exist, which of course only ignited her anger. She is walking on eggshells around you Patrick, because she is afraid to admit her feelings. I don't know why but you need to find that out. And now you have the chance."

Gary and Jane's eyes met and Jane knew his was filled with confusion.

"You have to tell her Patrick. Tell her why you left, ask her why she denied loving you 3 years ago. And now you won't have her pesky fiancée standing in the way." Gary stood and nodded his head for Jane to follow. Jane followed him to the kitchen where he saw 5 suitcases and many moving boxes.

"I'm leaving town. Officially. I was going to anyway, hence the announcement. But seeing as Teresa would much rather be with you, I may as well go. Now, I can see you have questions so go ahead. I'm listening." He folded his arms and awaited Jane to recover from the shock he was currently feeling.

"B...But... Y...you... What is your job? And why would you threaten Teresa's if you love her?"

Gary nodded. "Ah yes, I thought you may be curious. I do work for the FBI Patrick, but I have no control over Teresa's job. I actually am an agent, and a good one too, but I am a much lower position than Teresa. I could never actually make her lose her job. Silly you."

Gary walked past Jane, back into the living room and Jane tried to gather his thoughts.

"But you constantly told Lisbon how awful I was for what happened, made her feel guilty! No one does that! It doesn't work like that! You don't get to be the bad guy and then turn out to be the good guy after all of that, it doesn't work that way!" Jane yelled, trying to understand Gary's true intentions.

"You should be thanking me you know." Gary said, looking at Jane once more.

Jane scoffed. "Thanking you? How?"

"Well, if I hadn't given you that little push towards Teresa I wouldn't be leaving would I?"

Jane stared, mouth open, eyes wide. Gary pointed to the chair opposite him and Jane gingerly sat down.

"Our chat 2 months ago. About me being the villain? You didn't truly believe it did you?"

Jane, again, made no movement but his eyes did stay wide.

"Patrick, I have just revealed my job to you. Revealed I am no longer the bad guy and yet you are staring at me like I have another head. What is going on through your mind?"

"Why?" Jane questioned. "Why are you giving up on her so easily? What makes you think she wants me?"

"Patrick" Gary sighed before continuing. "I love Teresa with all my heart I really do. And I know, somewhere, she loves me too. But let's face it. I cannot compete with the fresh-faced, greeny-blue eyes blond consultant who she unwittingly fell in love with. It's you she is in love with, always has been and always will be. And whilst I'm not a man who liked to give up what he has... I know she'll be happier with you. Someone she has real feelings for, not using to disguise them."

Gary stood once more and reached his hand out to Jane, who reluctantly took it and shook it.

"It's been a pleasure, Mr Jane. Now, go and fight for the woman you love. You have nothing and no one standing in your way."

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

It had been a confusing day for Jane.

He had originally intended to leave Sacramento again, without saying goodbye to Teresa again. Then he had gone over to Gary's with the intention of making him feel small and inconsiderate, however Gary had basically given him a free pass to his fiancée.

Confusing indeed.

Gary had said he would go over to Lisbon's and break off the engagement. Jane was unsure how Lisbon would react or how Gary would break the news. And he wasn't sure how long he should before going over to Lisbon's and asking her the burning questions he'd been dying to know for 3 years.

It was 11:30pm.

Was it too late?

_No. She'll understand, come on. It's been 3 years, time to finally get what you have wanted for longer than you remember. _

And for once, Jane knew he should listen to his inner voice.

0-0-0

It was quarter to 12 by the time Jane got to Lisbon's.

The apartment was dark and he saw no sign of life. He knocked once and waited a few seconds before deciding perhaps now wasn't a good time. Just as he turned to leave a small voice stopped him.

"Jane?"

"Urm, hi." He whispered as he turned back round. He gasped slightly as he saw Lisbon's face was stained with tears and her cheeks were slightly red. Yet he couldn't help but marvel at her beauty. "I... think we needed to talk. But if this is a bad time, then I'll come back. I'm not going anywhere."

"No. Stay. Come in. I think it's time I did some explaining." She replied, her voice barely a whisper.

She allowed him to walk into her apartment and made his way into the front room. She fixed him a cup of tea before joining him. There was a deadly silence before one of them broke it.

"Do you want to know the worst part of today? Not the fact that Gary dumped me, not the fact that Bertram had another go at me, not the fact that I was going to get married in 3 days. No, it was the fact that you considered leaving again, without even saying goodbye." Lisbon looked up and Jane could see the hurt in her emerald eyes.

"Lisbon, I... I was going to go. I couldn't bear to stay. Not when you were so happy and I was so miserable. But then I realised I couldn't go, not without finding out who Gary was, without saying goodbye to the team, without finding out why you never admitted you love me." He stood and sat beside her on the couch, raising her chin with his finger. "Tell me. Please."

Lisbon swallowed her breath before tearing her gaze away and started to pace the room. "Do you know how much you have hurt me all these years? First with Red John, then all the schemes, then disappearing for 6 months. Then you go and tell me you love me and you expect me to believe it?!

"And at first, I didn't believe it. I mean how could you go from being that pain in my ass consultant to a romantic consultant in one day? It didn't make any sense. But during that week, I thought more and more about it and I realised it was a confession that took too long to come out. And I considered it more and more and realised I did want that. After years of pushing my feelings away, thinking you could never see me like that I didn't want it to be possible. And then, to my relief you did. And I never wanted to let you go.

"But I also had to consider everything else. Me, you, the CBI, my job, my life, my past, your past, Red John, Lorelei..." She paused for a second. "And whilst I knew you took a risk, admitting your feelings for me whilst Red John was out there, I couldn't...wouldn't do the same. Imagine how you would feel, if Red John got one of us whilst we were happy? It would ruin everything!"

"So, that's it. You denied your feelings for me because of Red John? For God's sake Lisbon..."

"Jane." Lisbon turned to face him, interrupting. "I'm not done."

"I knew that you were taking risks and whilst I knew that it would be wrong to have a relationship, I didn't care. I wanted you. You with all of your faults, and all your annoying quirks, I wanted them. Because I loved you. But there was still this nagging voice in the back of my head telling me this was a bad idea. And then I saw you... with her."

Lisbon's voice turned bitter, she turned back away from him and Jane knew what was coming next. It was a memory he chose to forget.

"We hadn't spoken in a few days and I knew that was my fault, I hadn't exactly reacted the way someone should. But I was ready to tell you, tell you how I felt. Tell you that despite everything, I wanted to be with you. I wanted to proudly call you my boyfriend, kiss you whenever, hold you whenever, call you mine. Everything. So I went to find you, and Rigsby mentioned you were in interrogation room 1. That was his first mistake.

"I assumed you and Cho were in there, interrogating a suspect. So I decided to wait behind the glass, watching you. But no. You were with her. Lorelei Martins. And it made me angry, everything she was saying. Speaking of your night together, telling you how connected she felt to you, how she knew that you wanted it as much as you acted, you enjoyed it. And then she called you 'lover' and you didn't flinch. You did nothing." Lisbon's voice broke in several places. "I wanted you to tell her to shut up, tell her about your confession to me, and tell her that she was nothing. Nothing at all, just a pawn in your game of chess. But you didn't.

"Instead, when she asked you kissed her."

"I didn't know you knew that." He confessed.

"Why would you? I didn't mention it, you didn't mention it, and no one did. It was in that second I knew I couldn't be with you. Not whilst she was around."

"That doesn't explain why you denied your feelings. You knew the thing with Lorelei before I told you I loved you. I told you I would do anything to capture Red John, right from the start." Jane stood up from the couch and made his way over to Lisbon, resting his hands on her shoulders. She turned in his arms and faced him, tears glistening in her eyes.

"I guess I just wanted to hurt you before you got another chance to hurt me again." She confessed, eyes never leaving his.

And there it was. The reason behind Lisbon's denial, the reason behind Jane's leaving; out in the open.

"And then, when I realised how immature I had acted it was too late. You had gone. You'd left without any trace and I didn't know how I would cope. I cried everyday; begging God to bring you home, make sure you were safe. I didn't know what to do. I had ruined everything because of one jealous moment!

"I started to recover, accepted you were never coming back. Then I met Gary. And he was everything you weren't. So I allowed myself to fall for him and eventually I did. But I never forgot you. You were always in the back of my mind, always nagging at me to change things left off but I never did. I just carried on every day like you weren't there."

She stayed in Jane's arms, which had now lowered around her waist. He didn't speak, just watched her and waited for her to continue.

"I was happily engaged, I can't even remember how or when it happened, it kind of did. I always imagined my second engagement would be to you..." She giggled slightly. "I walked into work, it had been 3 months since I last thought of you and suddenly you were stood there. In the bullpen. Looking normal. Perfect, it didn't make sense. I couldn't comprehend why you were there. But I didn't want to make a scene. To be honest, I was so happy to see you. I just wanted to hug and hit you. I had missed you so much.

"But I couldn't forgive you for leaving, or kissing Lorelei which is why I acted so cruelly towards you. It was my way of coping. My defence mechanism. But Jane, I was so happy to have you back. I didn't want Gary anymore; I remembered how much I wanted everything I allowed myself to forget. And now I fear, it's too late. I lost you once and probably have forever."

She tried to pull away but Jane kept his arms around her waist. He removed one so he could wipe her silent tears.

"Teresa Lisbon. You could never lose me. Not ever. I shouldn't have kissed Lorelei; it was part of the act. And I regret it everyday. I have spent 3 years hating myself because I couldn't understand why I had lost a woman I never even had. And now, I have the opportunity to get you back. And I'm going to take it."

Their eyes met once more and they shared a small smile.

"I love you Teresa Lisbon. And I have for a long time now. And despite the fact that I slept with one of Red John's disciples never changed the fact my love for you ran deep. And god, how I wish I had never taken it back when I 'shot' you. We could have saved ourselves a whole lot of drama." He smirked as she playfully hit his arm. "I know its going to take a while to re-gain your trust but I don't want to miss another second."

"I think I can agree to those terms." Lisbon whispered huskily, as Jane's sweet breath wafted over her lips. Ever so slowly, their lips became one and they shared a kiss. It wasn't hurried or passionate, it was a light sweet kiss, the way there first kisses should have been.

Lisbon regretfully pulled away. "I love you too, by the way."

Jane pressed his forehead to hers, and laughed slightly. "Only taken you 3 years to admit it." He smiled as he felt Lisbon's hand slap his forearm.

"You are aware I'm not rushing into a relationship with you. I've only recently become single again." She giggled, her eyes closing.

"That's okay. We have as long as we need. I don't intend to lose you again."

"I don't intend to become a jealous cow again... well not for a while anyway." Lisbon started to laugh before Jane's lips interrupted her. She didn't complain though, she had missed her chances to kiss him for 3 years now.

She had a lot of making up to do.

* * *

**A/N: so, what did you think? Right way to end a chapter? Pleased Gary wasn't evil after all? Thank you all so much for reading my first multi-length chapter because you honestly don't know how wonderful you all are! I know I'm not as great as writer as most on here, but I write because it makes me happy. But you have all stuck with me and I can't express how much I love every one of you who has reviewed, favourited and followed. **

**Now, I do have a little one shot to follow this, just to give it a perfect ending as I'm sure we all want a little bit of Jane and Lisbon romance, yes? ;) **

**Anyway, this is the end of Listen to Your Heart and I personally have enjoyed myself. If you loved this, then put me on Author Alert because as mentioned I'm writing a new story called "**_**The Devil is always Red" **_**and I'm really excited! **

**But for now, GOODBYE. AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING MY STORY. **

**Much love, Lauren. **


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